Murphy's Law...

I've noticed that the things that I worry about intensely, you know lose sleep and twist my stomach into unrecognizable knots over, those are the things that usually turn out okay. Like dreading that horrible confrontation with a friend or boss and then when you finally do it, the person is just like, "Yeah, okay, no big deal." And they stare at you, like why are you sweating so profusely while discussing this? But it's the other things--the events that you think are going to be great or the ones that you don't even really think of at all--that always blow up in your face in a rather dramatic fashion.

Fortunately, I nearly worried myself into a breakdown over the reading last night, so, of course, it was great! Okay, I was really, really nervous and probably was not the best reader ever. But I did not fall down, although I did almost fall out of the chair a couple times -- overvarnished chair and slippery cotton/lycra blend pants are a bad combination, just in case you were wondering. My legs were totally aching this morning from pushing against the chair rung to hold myself in place, I kid you not. But I didn't throw up -- yea me! And there weren't too many people there, nor were there too few -- just perfect : )

So here's how it went down. I took the train in because I'm a big city driving sissy, which means I won't drive in the city except in dire circumstances, and even then my first vote will be for public transportation. I went to my husband's building, which was kind of fun. It's always weird to see someone familiar to you in a work setting. He's so responsible there, you know? At home this is the man who...never mind, I better not finish that sentence : ) It'll get me in trouble, even though I'm only teasing!(Love you, sweetie *grin*) I met a lot of fun people who wanted to talk about writing and books, which was great.

At around 6:30, Alisa, the reviewer who'd put me in touch with Twilight Tales for the reading came by to pick me up and drive me over to the reading -- so very nice of her!! I'd mentioned that I'd be taking a cab (my husband had to finish up work and would meet us later) and she volunteered to get me instead : )

Twilight Tales, a weekly reading series, is held in the upstairs room of the Red Lion Pub. The Red Lion is this really cool, old-looking, authentic (to me, anyway) English pub. Plus, the upstairs room is rumored to be haunted. Though, I have to say, I didn't see or hear anything unusual while we were there, for which I'm very grateful. I really enjoy the paranormal...just from a distance.

As soon as we walked in, I saw my friends, Karen and Sanjay. I was so excited! Karen hadn't told me they were coming, so it was this great surprise!!! We decided to eat together, so we placed our orders at the bar and went upstairs. The upstairs is kind of dim and pub-like, or what I imagine pubs to look like, never having been in a real one, you know, in England or Ireland. Dark heavy furniture, beams on the wall, low lighting, pleasant levels of low conversation and the murmur from the television below. It smelled of old building, smoke and beer, but not in that gross way. Just in that comforting sort of familiar way.

The crowd grew to include my husband, my brother, several of my husband's co-workers and his friends from volleyball -- all of whom were nice enough to come out and listen to someone they'd never even met before!

Twilight Tales always has two readers, and when asked my preference, I said I wanted to go second. Yes, I'd be nervous longer, but I'd get to see how the first person did it. There were lots of questions inherent in this that I'd never thought about before. Like, could you stop whenever you wanted to get a sip of water? If you messed up in reading, do you acknowledge it and correct it? Do you announce new chapters as you're reading?

The answers to those questions, near as I can tell are, Yes. Yes, but only if you can do so unobtrusively. And, yes. At least, I did.

The other writer, Jim Doherty, I think his name was -- I don't have his book here in front of me-- was a police officer who'd published short stories and articles and was working on his first book. So, he read one of his articles, a short story and an excerpt from his novel. I enjoyed hearing him read, and I really liked his short story, a different take on Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart." Of course, being the pretty sheltered person that I am, I was also fascinated that he wore his gun and his badge on his belt during the reading. I mean, he had them on the whole time, it's just that when he sat down to read, I noticed them because I was sitting pretty close to the front. There's a line in The Silver Spoon, where Zara sees Nevan with a gun and realizes how much bigger it looks when it's pointed at her. That was based on a startling moment when I passed in close proximity to one of the armed guards here changing out the trays in our ATM. Not that the guard pointed it at me or anything, but just that guns always seem bigger and scarier to me when they're near me versus on television.

Anyway, once Jim was done reading, it was my turn. The great thing about this venue was that it was small and cozy. I was still nervous, but there weren't more people there than could have fit in my living room and dining room. That helped me relax. Plus, they had this really bright light over the reading chair, so while that was scary at first, it actually helped. Made it harder to see anyone in the darkness watching me.

I started off, highly conscious of where I was and what I was doing. But after a few minutes, I got into the flow, felt the familiar words passing over through me and got into it enough that sometimes I'd forget to be self-conscious. So much so that a couple times when people laughed, it actually startled me. That was another interesting thing. People found different things funny than I did as the writer. Not to say that they were laughing at the wrong places, or anything. Just not the places I would have picked if someone said, "Find me a funny line in your book." But that was great. Because one of the cool things about writing is that you discover different people get different things out of it, often something on a level entirely other than what you intended. How cool is that?!?

Once I got going, the only time I felt weird up there was when I stopped for a chapter break and took a sip of water. Because then you can feel this sort of hushed silence and all this attention bearing down on you -- they're waiting for you to start again. I never realized that you could feel that kind of attention directed at you, but you can. Almost like a weight against your skin. It was really interesting and flattering too, I think, that people would listen that closely. Though, I can tell you now very clearly that I would never want to be an actor or performer. *shudder*

Afterward, I signed a few more books, then we packed up and went home. Overall, a very satisfying and happy evening. Thank you to everyone who came out last night, and to Alisa and Eric for getting this set up for me! I had fun and I really appreciate the support of everyone who bought a book or came to listen : )